Day 4: How have your friends and family reacted to it?
To be honest, I lost a huge portion of support from family almost the minute I got sick. When I explained to them that I was in a ton of pain and was going to doctors to find out what was wrong with me, they said I was overreacting. They said I was just lazy. They said I should ‘do my duty’ and go to work and be a better wife. And on and on.
Friends stayed for awhile, then I finally got my diagnosis and it all changed. First I stopped going out as much due to my illness, they understood at first. As the months passed, the calls came less and less. Finally my phone just didn’t ring at all.
Then, the ones that did stay, tried to make it my fault. “Your illnesses are bad but I can’t believe you won’t suck it up for your friends for one night.”
“You never feel good, maybe if you did yoga or exercised more, you wouldn’t feel so bad.”
“Avoiding this food just because some paper says its not good for your so called condition? that’s just stupid.”
“If you went to church more, you would feel better.”
And this one is my favorite *Sarcasm* “Its your choices that made you this way. Everything was fine but then you moved to a new state, got married, and you “suddenly” got sick,
So, no, they didn’t handle it well at all.
But although I lost a lot of friends and family when I got sick 6 years ago and have trouble even now, I did find the most amazing people through support groups on Facebook.
People who understand and accept you no matter what. One such group is We’re In This Together
The woman who helps run this with her sisters is amazing. She does her best to help everyone and does this all on her free time because she cares about us.
She runs fun contests, allows posts of all kinds, not just the positive ones, because she knows its not always ‘good’ in life when you live with chronic pain or illness(es).
She runs the group with her three sisters- Caitlyn, Melody, and her friend, Dylan.
I don’t think I could have survived dealing with a new diagosis without the amazing people in the group and some other such groups.